I had three boys in a five year period.  You may gasp at the thought, but it is the biggest blessing in my life.  There were days when I felt overwhelmed – those ugly puking and diarrhea days.  Otherwise, those munchkins made me laugh and smile everyday.  And this one particular day was very special.

I am picking the boys up from school.  They were young – fourth grade, second grade, and pre-school.  They are all buckled in the back seat –  three across.  I am mommy chauffeur!  A very serious discussion breaks out between the boys and I decide to only listen.  Conversations between young kids are hilarious.  But little did I know, I am about to hear some profound wisdom.

The youngest, Jack, announces that another boy is hitting him on the playground everyday, and he is very angry.  “What should I do?” asks Jack.  Austin, my oldest, does not hesitate to give the following advice.  “If you ask mom, she will say ‘talk it out.’  If you ask Dad, he will tell you to hit him back!”

I almost crash the car!  That is just too funny!  I am astounded he knows his two options.  Also, he is totally correct that I would encourage a non-violent  tête-à-tête between two school comrades.  He is also correct that my husband would offer enemy retaliation as a solution.  I am stumped.  I have to think about this before I respond.

It was the first time I realized that moms and dads sometimes offer a different perspective on life.  Was I right this time?  I think so!  But I did learn that sometimes kids should stand up for themselves.  “Set the tone early that you will not be bullied!” is my husband’s rationale.  And he is right, too.  I see that boys and girls benefit from the feminine and masculine perspectives.

A child’s life is enriched not only by their mom and dad, but by grandparents, relatives, good friends, and trusted caregivers.  It is a blessing when children have a small tribe of loved ones in their lives.  There may sometimes be conflicting messages, but that is a part of life.  We spend our whole life navigating right and wrong and the gray that exists.  It is a true pearl to gift children with many positive influences!

But, I still think I was right!  Do you?

Photo by Brigitta Schneiter on Unsplash